Many people are interested in kink and would like to explore it, but they fear the consquences for their relationships if they try, of hurting someone or being hurt, physically and/or emotionally.

There’s also the idea in our culture that kink is dark or unhealthy. There is a social stigma, which prevents a lot of people from trying or experimenting with it. Certainly, in kink we do play with taboo fantasies and taboo behaviours, but in a play context where each partner understands that its purpose is to turn each other on, to give pleasure/pain and explore. Kink can be dangerous, but generally only when people are unaware of their bodies and their limits.  

In the play shop, we will define the Conscious Body Approach to Kink, i.e., one that is based on learning to read and listen to our own bodies and that of others. In an impact play session, for example, the aim in hitting your partner is not to cause them pain, but to invigorate them energetically and in the process to invigorate oneself and the space between you and beyond you. Similarly, when tying someone up, restricting them or suspending them: the space between and beyond you becomes electric and charged - similar to what happens in a performance or a ritual.

BDSM does not feel the way that it looks. It can look very confronting. But this is not how it is being experienced by the people inside it. It challenges the ways that we think people should behave towards one another and the ways that we understand pleasure in our bodies. This is part of its enormous value.